Thursday, December 29, 2011

WHAT THE--?!

~Sea of Twilight~

Mom comes home and one of her first words (which are always, really ALWAYS complaints): "Why didn't your younger sisters do anything?! Why can't you tell them anything?!"

Well, sorry, I tried, but I am not spending my entire day on yelling at them like you do for them to do something. If they don't do it after the nth time I tell them, it's their problem, I have my own life to take care of, too, even if it's mostly tumblr and Star Project and reading Amatsuki and being overly controlling of your kids and siblings will make them more spiteful and less independent, LOOK AT ME, MOM.

Her reply? "Ah yes, your way of raising kids is great, you have great results, right? That's why they always take you as example and don't do things."

Wait, since when did I become the secondary mother...?! AS IF YOUR WAYS OF RAISING KIDS HAVE BEEN ANY GOOD. And it's goddamnit not my fault they follow my example. I didn't choose to be their example, it's their fucking own choice when they do it, why is it always my fault?! Why do you make your and my life miserable by coming home and complaining and never seeing anything positively, never coming home with a smile or at least TRY to be a tad bit more positive?! I don't know how you survive day fro day, lade, you are pretty strong because I can't do that, I can't live like you and be depressive and sad and self-pitying and aggressive all the item, it is DESTROYING ME!

"You are crazy, so crazy and idiotic!"

Gee, right back at you! WHO IS AGGRAVATING ME, HUH?! Can't you just shut up? Can't you be less narrow-minded? Can you be less negative?! There are moments where I'd just want to kill myself just to spite you, just to show you what you are doing to your kids, just to shake you awake, MOTHER!


WEEEEELL, that's why this useless blog exists, I can vent off my frustrations by written words at no-one in particular (I can't and don't want to always bother my friends with m,y problems, ahaha....) and I still feel somewhat better afterwards. Sorry to those who stumble over this angry rant. Take cute Touya-kun (I star-named him Thario, so what?) here~

Ohh, Touya-puu, how I wish I could live in your world sometimes...now I am not even motivated to play or do anything productive GAAAAAH.

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Plans for tonight

~Sea of Twilight~


  • Continuing the self-made mood-theme for Arisu Yuki for my RP-tumblr because I chose her as RP-character to make random RPpostsn with Starry Sky flirtblogs xD
  • Continuing Eden-chan's birthday fic (yes, I am way overdue...)
  • Continuing Starry Sky RI-fic because the few translated Christmas Kiss-events of honeybee is just so goddamn cute and hot and aaaaaaah♥
  • Practising hiragana, katakana and kanji. Ahahaha.....
Okay, off to reply to Miyaji's flirtblog (or was it his yandere flirtblog...?).

Merry Christmas xD

~Sea of Twilight~

Omnomnomnom, Christmas Eve meal, we had quails and two big lobsters~ Although there were many fights and many obstacles (like always), somehow it worked out...

And I started finally to ask/RP with the flirtblogs in tumblr. Ahh, so excited~

Oh. OHHH, AND STAR PROJECT♥ It is RABUUUUUU. And I actually want to spend some real money on that game, sadly, apparently you can't pay from Germany yet. Ahahaha.....the irony, I am willing to pay once and then they don't let me....

Friday, December 23, 2011

Look look look! Mite mite miteeee!!!

~Sea of Twilight~

ASDFGHJKL HIME-CHAAAAAAAAN. YOU GAVE ME A PRESENT  ALONG WITH THE RUBBER STRAPS AND I HAVE NOTHING FOR YOU TAT. Thank you so much you are such a nice friend aaaaaaaaaah!!!!

And I ahve yet another friend who just dropped by, gave me a little present and I had nothing DARN IT AAAAH.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

スター☆プロジェクトとてもが好き!!!

~Sea of Twilight~

Or something. Yay, I have holidays from now on, for two weeks, I finally sent the package to Japan and today I have work shift with my friend~

And then I realizes Star Project was translated to English?! WHY DIDN'T I REALIZE IT?! I am so going to play it once I am at home, sadly, I am at the university now and won't come home until veeery late. *sobsob*
And tomorrow I have early shift, too. Sheesh. At least I get money this way to buy myself an iPod touch and a PSP. And someday a 3DS because of DREAM DROP DISTANCE AAAAAAAH.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

...venting off my frustration now.

~Sea of Twilight~


…sometimes I really wonder why I bother with you. I don’t care when you are lazy. But please on’t be lazy when it’s about your best friend. When we try to arrange a meeting, when you have problems with that either you put some efforts into making it to the meeting, since it’s us friends that are doing this for you, or if you don’t feel like coming up with any efforts and rather have it easy and unproblematic, then fucking say you don’t come, simple as that. Your indecisiveness really gets on my nerves lately, we rarely see each other already, we still call each other best friends because really, we are, and I like you amd I hate how we spend so little time together lately because we are going different paths for a while after graduation, so if we want to meet again to go to the Christmas Market when YOU really wanted to do that, why is it so difficult to arrange soemthing with you?
Your car, sure, it’s difficult to store away a car in the city and it’s slightly complicated to make this work but it isn’t impossible, it isn’t too difficult, you could do it if you really wanted, friendship is about putting effort into your doings for your friends and sacrificing a few inconveniences, right? We are putting our efforts into this by spending our time that we don’t really have but really want to give to you to show you the big city we are studying in, the Christmas Market that is held there, so where is your effort?
…why is it always so difficult? No wonder my parents say I am acting too much like a loyal dog to some of my friends when they don’t do something of similiar sacrificing for me, I get angry…because I know sometimes they are right.
It is really sad. Maybe I am a bit too mean. But I am so frustrated. …because I am neither close to my family, nor can I really completely rely on friends. Hah, lonely, isn’t it. No, wait, it’s pathetic. Sheesh.
I know you won’t read this, you neither use tumblr, nor do you know I do. Someday I will tell you. Someday you will tell me what I do to annoy you and then we are hopefully even. But now, this is just for me to get it off my chest and focus on otehr things in my life. You amy be my best friend, but I am not willing to put up with you like this forever. I will enver stop calling you my best friend, I hope, but I will never stop being disappointed of you if this continues. copypasted from my tumblr

Ah, but my family frustrates me, too. I am really willing to leave my parents' apartment soon, if it wasn't inconvenient with my exchange semester in Japan I plan to do in two years. AHHHHHH.

Also, I am really tempted to buy Natsume Yuujinchou DVDs already. And Clearfolders, but they are so expensive, Starry Skyyyyyy....! And I still need Christmas Presents for both my host family and my actual family. Ahahaha....

Friday, December 9, 2011

...and another planned purchase.

~Sea of Twilight~

...ahaha, the hell, why is there no iPod Touch with 16 GB? 8GB is too little for me and 32GB is too much.... But i kinda see myself buying the 32GB version anyway, for I will load loads of manga on it and Drama CDs and my music and....I'll need this space. Or maybe I check how many Drama CDs I have and how much space they take up. BUT I NEED AN iPod TOUCH. I need more space for my MP3-Player, anyway, my old one is sometimes screwing with me lately and I wanna buy some apple-exclusive apps liek that Hakuoki app or that Shukan Soine app or the Starry Sky app................../D

Screw saving up. It's Christmas and in two months my birthday, anyway~

Someday I gotta clean up and organize my taglist, sheesh...

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Planned purchase December 2011

~Sea of Twilight~

...because it's going to be Christmas and all and my student support money thingie finally was transferred (heh, what did you think I'd use the money for aside from food? xD) and my first paycheck is about to come....YES, I AM KINDA RICH FOR THIS MONTH~~~~

That is why I will purchase a lot. And that is why I am going to make a list. Yay~


  • Hakuoki PSP (English)
  • Play Station Portable (yes, shortly before Vita release, because, I need a PSP first)
  • Starry Sky Clearfolder
There are stuff like Natsume Yuujinchou and maybe UtaPri VOICE MASCOTS as well as Natsume Yuujinchou's Malaysian ripoff DVDs I wanna buy, and an original Japanese DVD I wanna buy via AmiAmi someday, but that I will probably push until January or February. I pray they are still available until then 8D ...you can tell I will spend a fortune on everything, right? Ahh....and I still have to save up for moving out, Japan trip, Japan semester and saving up in general. Hahahaha, good joke /shot.



PS: I LOVELOVELOVE my Japanese host family from Ogano. I LOVELOVELOVE them, they are so kind and supporting and AAAAAHHH, I'll prepare some Christmas package for them these weeks and send it to them and and and AAAAAAAH. they sent money to me via letter saying i shall sue it for school preparations and stuff and they didn't have to do this and I wanna hug them and ASDFGHJKL♥
 
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